Quote Originally Posted by phantasy_seeker
Why was I so weak as to give up and safeword just when I was made to do something that I disliked and felt that I couldn't take? I'd done things that I disliked before, but this one just kinda pushed me over the edge to the point where I conveniently safeworded in order to avoid doing it.
IMHO
Possibly something caused you to drop you out of role, out of the zone, out of the matrix into the real world. In a role, certain things need to happen to keep the bubble going. This all happens in the mind. It's not a question of doing things you don't like, or having things done to you, that you don't like. For me that is part of the idea. But if the overall picture starts to fade and the important buttons are not being pushed, the moment can be lost and doing something you don't like becomes pointless.
Just a thought.

BDSM play can be very complex, when something goes wrong don't worry about it, it happens to all of us, nothing to beat yourself up over. unless you're a masochist, then, er, I hate this paradox stuff.

We live, we learn, don't worry about it, go off and have more fun.