Wow...just wow...reading through your post leaves me just horrified, koppite, that anyone would do such a thing to you. Clearly, you have been taken serious advantage of, and that's very wrong. You asked to be a sub, yeah, but your Domme has abused you emotionally and physically -- where is her responsibility to take of you in this? Permanent markings that weren't supposed to mean anything...particularly with her name? Refusing to let up on play for your emotional well being? That's twisted and sick abuse of what we all hold dear. Don't put up with it. Bail. Clearly your Domme has a hell of a lot to learn, first of all to respect her partner, and you sholdn't be a guinea pig for that.

Seriously, if your partner doesn't respect you, fuck em. Humiliating, dominating, controlling should never include a lack of respect (although yes, sometimes that respect comes in quirky ways, the most vile term should still be full of it).

As for the possibility of a permanent relationship as a male sub...oh my god yes. I'd say half the men out there are living it to some degree! I'm in the reverse situation, a top and my wife is the bottom, but we've been married 6 years, a couple for 10. There's no lack of wonderful women who want to take care of a cherished pet...don't let some fuckwit abuse you. Like all relationships, it's hard to find the "right one"; all I can suggest is to stop worrying about it and enjoy everyone and everything in the now...that's what's most likely to help you find the right one, and for them to find you.