Less of a submissive?

[Daes]

This has been an excellent thread, I've enjoyed reading the responses.

We all need to start somewhere, how else are we to learn what we need and desire? I started online and Im glad I did, there's so much information and you can learn so much from communities.

I think the online bdsm community has a bad rep because there are so many that pose around and it makes a bad name for those that really do embrace the lifestyle. Its a shame that its judged that way. There's soo much to learn from Both online and RL, its good to know the differences between them, why those differences are there and realize that that Is okay. Its not like one can say "I am a sub" or "I am a Dom" and automatically find those in RL that are in the lifestyle that you can learn from.

I think its unfair to downplay the online D/s populus just because one has RL experience, it makes you no better than one that is just beginning to discover bdsm over the net.

As I said, we all need to start somewhere, and where that happens doesnt make Anyone less of who they are, whether it be Dom, sub, or Switch.

[Tojo]

I think Tom says it pretty well actually. I ride a Jap bike & hear how terrible it is from the owners of a 'certain brand of American motorcycle'

I cry myself to sleep every night, burning with shame for not doing exactly as they do....

This whole year I've been consumed with guilt- am I a real Dom? Are my strokes with the flogger hard enough? Is a 24/7 relationship with 10 slaves enough?

If I have a harem with male & female slaves, am I a lesser being for not having a few transexuals??

This is the one thing that makes me groan & grind my teeth in the D/s community- the divisions. We carry it right in from the outside world- where we're categorised into rich/poor, young/old- racial groups etc. etc. ad infinitum.

I'm still waiting to see the D/s rulebook- until then I'll happily believe that if you think you're a subby you probably are one. Anytime I feel like a good laugh I'll go back & make another post on one of the forums run by those who have forgotten what 'fun' means.

Funny- no one ever replies to my posts there....

Tojo