I can sympathize- I'm learning to a Dom (so I hope it isn't only inborn!) and one of my problems early on was a tendency to hold back and trust that I wasn't going to do something to hurt my girl. I've done better lately, I think, and we're enjoying it.

I don't know if it'd help too much, but something that might give you an idea would be to consider how he acted when you were subbing? It might give you some ideas about what he's looking for from his Dom.