dk: It's just like in real life. There's a difference between laughing with and laughing AT someone. There's definitely a place for humor in a D/s relationship, just as with any relationship. But there's no place for making you feel belittled. Humiliated as part of a scene because it turns him on, sure... as others have said... but his first responsibility as a Dom is for your health and welfare. That ABSOLUTELY COMES FIRST, before his own desires... it's that little known secret of submission, that that concern for the other person works both ways.

Maybe he, or both of you, should try to look at the relationship NOT as one of "domination" but one of "mastery." It sounds like the same thing but it isn't. Domination is forcing your will on someone. Mastery is accepting their submission. Domination/submission is really a misnomer: you can't actually submit to domination, by definition. Mastery involves real responsibility for the person who submits to you. Good models for mastery can be found outside the bedroom too: a good teacher, for example. Think Yoda ;-). Not everythign Yoda had Luke do was something Luke wanted to do. Not everything was something Luke even believed was for his own good. And Yoda laughed plenty. But he didn't laugh AT Luke. Yeah, I know, Star Wars as how to live your life is pretty silly but, hey, it's our shared mythology in this modern age . Or, maybe he's had a pet (not that you're a pet in your relationship but again, it's a situation requiring Mastery) -- if you have a pet dog who worships you and wants to please you, you can require it to do any number of things that it might not choose to do normally: roll over, sit and wait while there's food tempting it... whatever. But you don't do things specifically to make the dog feel bad about itself for your own amusement: you don't say "bad dog!" when it hasn't been bad just to laugh at it cowering, do you?

Anyway, I wish you the best in this and I think you probably shouldn't offer your submission to him until he understands his responsibilities in return... M/s is built on a foundation of trust and honesty and responsibility... make sure those are firmly in place first.

Best wishes,
phragmites