Steve is not passive, because he hasn't accepted his slavery. I've tried to make his duress a little more obvious. Please let me know if this works. Anyway, since the manager knows he is under duress, I felt he would take sadistic pleasure in the cat-and-mouse power game. Opinions? AG? HD?
I will leave the indepth analysis of this piece to H Dean but I can already see a big improvement. The piece flows better now and also has more consistency. I do think the manager would enjoy the cat and mouse game and in your re-write the emotions shown by Steve are far more convincing.

Great job and depending on what H Dean has to say, we will wait to see about the next piece of writing. I still want to see you put Steve into a different situation but there is no rush to get it done.

Cheers
AG