If you are looking for feedback, here is mine.
I really enjoyed this story. I was not distracted by typos.. which is appreciated.
My one main tip for you, from a readers standpoint (I'm not a writer), is to section out the paragraphs. I have trouble following large chunks of text. In the characters recitation of her answers to his questionnaire, break it up into typical q&a format... this could draw out the readers anticipation.
I almost gave up on the two largest chunks of text in your story, but was drawn in, so chose to highlight a line or two at a time, this way my eyes were not able to lose their place in the story.
I'm seriously looking forward to hearing more of this story.
Good Luck Steel1sh!!![]()