Hmm, I'm in a similar place that you are, arwcuw, since I never had a r/l D/s relationship. But from my online experiences and things that get me hot...yeah, I love fighting back at least sometimes. It hypes up the intensity, makes the domly one more aggressive or assertive...and I like that. I feel all the more submissive when I finally have to give in.

That said...I'd never want it to go to a point where I 'win' the fight and would have to take over the top role. It's just not my kink.

I've made some similar experiences in my more vanilla r/l sexual encounters. Memories of playing hard to get while still flirting and making the guy hot, getting 'angry' at approaches from my partner, wrestling in bed and trying to shake him off...come to mind. And it was always a huge disappointment when the guy really let me off and I won. This was all before I knew what I was doing there...it was just a game for me. *sighs* unfortunately most of my ex's were not really the domly types and I won a lot...