In my opinion, this need will not simply go away if it is ignored.

I made my first BDSM experiences before the time when everybody had a computer, and found and married a Dom in real life :-)
Even so, there are things Iīd like to do and that are simply not possible, because they would create permanent and severe physical injuries, or would even end lethal (which is something that neither my Dom nor I want).
I found someone with whom I can play these things online - hubby knows this, he even likes to read it -, though. For me, it is a great relief and helps getting these wishes - or rather, the urgency - out of my head for a while.

Moreover, there were things I basically wanted, but could not tell my hubby because I thought them really just too dirty... or which I did not allow myself to like, because they just did not fit into the picture I had of myself. Several forum members, mostly subs, were a huge help for me in those areas, and helped me to accept myself, and helped me to get brave enough to let hubby know. I would like to thank them for that, yet again.

So, within these limited settings, I am pro-online :-)

As for people who live with a vanilla spouse and donīt want to or canīt realize what they want and need - I could not tell.

It has been my experience, though, that wanting something, and being forced to suppress these needs, can be very harmful to a relationship.

These were just my 2 cents. I do NOT advocate to do things behind your partnerīs back, though. I just donīt believe that suppressing works. Not in the long run.