It's hard, sometimes, to see the changes we go through as we proceed through life. My sub Rose is almost the opposite of you: she was always submissive and retiring, just a clerk, never a boss. We've been together three plus years and she is now a General Manager who took a major losing business to profit in a year and has consolidated her position so it is the best in the region and the leader in many ways in her community.

He found your wall, Confuzd132, and broke it down a brick at a time. You were sublimating your need for care and guidance behind force and bravado. He saw the submissive behind it, and brought her to fruition.

The hardest thing is to get back on the horse after you fall off. It seems to be the time you start looking again, for another who can touch your heart.