I appreciate the concern. This is a good community.

Luck, instinct, and carefulness. I found this fellow through placing an online ad, and some of the responses I got were offputting at best, over-the-top creepy at worst. What made me want to write back to this guy (and then continue responding, and exchange numbers, and talk, and meet...) was in fact how sane he sounded. He asked about my vanilla and my sex interests in a way that showed he knew I was a real person, not a sex toy. He talked about boundaries, limits, and safewords in a way that showed that he understood their need (physically and psychologically) and took them seriously. When we met, it was very obvious that he was an ordinary guy... obviously that's something of an instinctual judgment, but I've been through my share of batshit, I've learned how to read my intuition, I have a decent sense of when something or someone seems fishy. This guy tripped none of my batshit detectors.

Now granted you could make the argument that we were foolish, both of us, for not establishing an agreed-upon signal before he gagged me - and I would agree. It's something we should have done, and if we play again I'll definitely bring it up. There was a point when the ring slipped sideways in my mouth; I made loud and definite "Hey, something's up, I need your attention" noises (very different from the quiet little moaning "no" noises I'd been making) and he immediately paused to set things straight.