July 25

Dearest Diary:

I have met the nicest girl here named suchaminx.

I had gone out of my room for a bit to explore and find a quite place to smoke a ciggy and have a chocolate martini. When I returned there was a cute little girl in the dorm giggling and pointing at my bed.

“Hello” I said glancing at the bed and wondering what was so funny “I’m Widget, but all my friends call me Widge.

“Hello yourself” she said. “suchaminx and very nice to meet you.” Followed by more giggling.

I took a closer look at my bed and there was a note stuck to the headboard by one of the hooks on it. Honestly I have never seen so many hooks on furniture in all my life. I even saw some on the chairs. I took the letter down and opened it.

Suchaminx giggled again “I see that our pervy caretaker Ted has left you a note.”

I glanced up at her as I read it and nodded. I handed her the note. “Can he do this?? I mean what insolence is he talking about ? I haven’t even met him yet.” I growled indignantly, while at the same time hiding a little shiver at the thought of being naked and holding that tray.

“He is just the caretaker.” She replied “but he seems to have some disciplinary control over Miss Gonzales.”

“Right” I nodded. Miss Gonzales must have been the teacher I saw over his knee when I got there. “Well this calls for a drink while I think about what to do.”

“That heartless bastard!!” I hollered as I opened up my bag from under my bed. All my vodka.. gone…”that wanker stole all my booze!!!

“My dear Uncle Ernest made that batch in the bathtub the day before I left. We can’t use that bath tub any more because my Aunt Lorelean passed away in it right after we made that batch of brew.”

“One minute she was standing there, the next she took a sip and yelled ”I’m Blind” and fell forward into the tub dead. That. Was. The . last of a very good day for vodka.” I sat down on the edge of the bed sniffling.

This calls for action. “Do you know where Mr. Stoat’s room is?” I asked suchaminx.

“Sure” she said “all though he is most likely to be taking extra exams with Miss Gonzales this time of day.”

“Show me please?’ I asked

So off we went, down several dank hallways to a small room in the back. This is when I discovered his diary. I mean if a book is left in a cubby hole behind a headboard and pad locked shut, I don’t think the owner has any expectation of privacy what so ever.

“That man read my diary” I was indignant. Flipping through the other entries to show suchaminx. “It figures he is related to that pig holding woman” I grumbled. “Just look at what else he gets up too and I still can not believe he took my booze.”

“I think that Ted needs to be taught a lesson” I said looking at suchaminx “ do you think that any of the other girls would be in on this? Meeting in the Dorm room coat closet at 8:00. Bring anyone that might want to help”

“Sounds fun” she said “Count me in and I will see who else can help”

I carefully put the diary back and while I was in there grabbed a bottle of Brandy to take back for tonight’s meeting and then together we headed back to the dorm. I just hope he doesn’t notice it missing until tomorrow.