Quote Originally Posted by slave327-834-200
Thanks Nikita and Aussiegirl
This has helped me understand more clearly something that happened to me last week when a scene was incredibly intense and lasted longer than it should have, not that i was complaining at the time, and Master couldn't stay for as long as he/we would have liked afterwards.

I felt terrible directly after, deeply depressed and questioning of myself and my desires, making myself feel guilty for liking what i do sexually, thinking i was soiled and dirty. I was lucky that it did not last long as i could speak later that day to Master about it, but at the time it was painful and i wasn't fully aware that it was a side effect to what had just taken place.

Thankfully I snapped out of it pretty quickly, with help, and I remembered how wonderful everything was during the scene and decided to focus on that. When we put our minds and bodies through such intense actions and feelings it is of no surprise that there will be side-effect but us humans still think we are invincible and don't always take necessary precautions.
Sweet Slave,

I can't caution you enough to take all steps necessary to see the above doesn't happen often.

Master couldn't stay for as long as he/we would have liked afterwards. I felt terrible directly after, deeply depressed and questioning of myself and my desires, making myself feel guilty for liking what i do sexually, thinking i was soiled and dirty.
I had the exact same feelings you did after the first few times we had heavy scenes. He would ask if I was ok, and I'd say yes. But, in reality, I felt so horrible...for days...and he picked up on it and insisted we talk immediately after every scene. At that time we were still learning about each other, so he took me at my word. And I was not experienced so I didn't know about sub-space or anything. So now, he cares for me until I'm safely back on earth. *grin*

Another thing, if there are any mood swings, you must inform one another of this. It is unfair to keep this information from each other. It will help to avoid any emotional mishaps.

Everyone is different, reactions vary from person to person, but deprivation of aftercare is a mind-fuck.

One time, I observed intense play and humiliation for the first time in r/l. The dom questioned his sub to see where she was mentally, for example, 'what color are your shoes, what did you eat for dinner, etc.' Once she started faltering on the easy questions, he brought her down very quickly, covered her with a blanket, held her tight for a long time, and then rubbed her reddened parts with cream. This showed me how much of a responsibility it is to be a dominant. (The word 'good' is a given.)

This is a great thread Aussiegirl. Your question opened dialogue, and elicited sharing.