Infidelity and BDSM

[leah06]

"Respect" isn't unconditional and there are some acts which strike a strong, negative chord with people.

If a child-molester or rapist came here and started describing his exploits, would you "respect" him or speak out against him? No, I am not implying a moral equivalency between these and infidelity, but they are all things that some people consider to be wrong. Good people, when faced with wrong, speak out against it.

Some people consider lots of things to be wrong, many of which people on this site participate in. I don't think it's enough that someone "considers" something to be wrong for them to speak in such a hurtful, sweeping manner. Of course we would all condemn a pedophile, but there's a lot of slippery slope between here and there and I don't think infidelity and pedophilia are equivalent. I think people should be very sure that whatever activity they are planning to condemn falls into the pedophile category before they use the most inflamatory and intemperate language they can muster.

Respect is a good place to start, and maybe people should ask themselves whether it's really necessary to depart from that in order to make a point.

[Ragoczy]

Some people consider lots of things to be wrong, many of which people on this site participate in. I don't think it's enough that someone "considers" something to be wrong for them to speak in such a hurtful, sweeping manner. Of course we would all condemn a pedophile, but there's a lot of slippery slope between here and there and I don't think infidelity and pedophilia are equivalent. I think people should be very sure that whatever activity they are planning to condemn falls into the pedophile category before they use the most inflamatory and intemperate language they can muster.

Respect is a good place to start, and maybe people should ask themselves whether it's really necessary to depart from that in order to make a point.

So who is the arbiter of what someone's allowed to think is wrong and speak out against strongly? You?

Some people do form a moral equivilency between things you may not. Do you get to stop them from saying those things are wrong? No, you get to speak out against them if you feel strongly enough.

Someone who feels homosexuality is wrong will speak out strongly against it. Many do so in a way that doesn't "respect" those they're speaking out against. That's their right and, frankly, duty to vigorously oppose what they feel is so wrong.

Just as it's my right and duty to vigorously oppose their ignorant, bigoted, hateful rhetoric. I might choose to use calm, reasoned arguments with them in the hopes of convincing them, but, at some point, when I see they're set in their bigotry, it's my right and duty to call them assholes.

And I think this has veered quite off the topic of infidelity, so I'll probably try very hard to leave it at that. Really, I will. Try. Yeah.

[leah06]

That's their right and, frankly, duty to vigorously oppose what they feel is so wrong.

People have many duties and sometimes they appear to conflict. I would simply urge people who feel a duty to speak abusively about a strongly-held belief to consider whether they have other duties as well, perhaps even to other members of this community, not to damage the fabric of the discussion.