uhm i think it's sheer good luck. i refuse to go online and look for a Dom, it just isn't what i want and getting attached to somebody with i don't know how much distance between you is effing painful, horrible, vile, annoying, frustrating [and so on and so forth], therefore, i dunno, i suppose it's just like going around looking for a vanilla partner--only more difficult *smiles*.
it does depend on what you're looking for, though. I mean, going out with my sub mode switched on will get me grovelling over guys for silly reasons. [i.e. oh the tone of his voice is so commanding, oh look at his posture] What we perceive in our heads to be domination does not necessarily mean that the other person is doing it on purpose lol. I figured that out the hard way...
in any case, back on track, if you get the answer to that, let me know, i'd like to find the One soon.