Do you have to balance vanilla & non?

[IAN 2411]

Do you honestly think it is in a child's best interest to be in a family where the parents stay unhappily married?

I never said that, you have misread my meaning; I said that the children’s interest must come first over the parents. It is obvious to all that if there is a serious breakdown of communication or there is violence or even child abuse then it is in the interest of all to split. However, the one we are talking about is by what [nawteeone] is saying sexual and I can’t believe that any man goes from a healthy sexual appetite to nothing without a damn good reason.

The point of getting married is to be with someone who you deeply love and want to spend your life with.

I just happened to fall for a guy who was unavailable. I certainly wasn't going to stay single my whole life because I couldn't have the man I wanted.

Then if that is true and [nawteeone] married for the reason you gave and the problem is only sexual then it must be worth the extra half mile to find out what the hell is wrong.

Every situation is unique, every person is unique, we are allowed to want what is best for us; we are allowed to want to be happy.

But not until all else has failed and unless you go that extra half mile you will never know what you might have thrown down the toilet.

My comments are written with respect to the person posting the questions and there is nothing personal meant.

Regards ian 2411

[openyoureyes]

I never said that, you have misread my meaning; I said that the children’s interest must come first over the parents. It is obvious to all that if there is a serious breakdown of communication or there is violence or even child abuse then it is in the interest of all to split. However, the one we are talking about is by what [nawteeone] is saying sexual and I can’t believe that any man goes from a healthy sexual appetite to nothing without a damn good reason.

I agree, before throwing in the towel on a marriage or looking to someone else to meet your needs, you should exhaust all possibilities with the person you're with. I think I took too much to heart what you said, as it very much hit a nerve with me. In my own personal situation I felt that I did everything I could before I finally decided I just couldn't do it anymore. I still struggle with the guilt from that decision, so I apologize for my overreaction.