I have always had a "secret" obsession with BDSM imagery and the mental idea of controlling, or being controlled by, another person in a vulnerable sexual situation. My ex wife made sure to let me know she was NOT interested in any part of it, and went out of her way to make me feel "bad" or "perverted" for having interest in anything other than "vanilla".

When I got divorced a few years back, I did allot of reading and introspection and realized how emasculated I had become and made massive strides towards becoming an "Alpha Male". I never even thought that that would cross over into sexuality, it just didn't occur to me. Well I met some women through dating and discovered that the "Passive Submissive Male" is a major problem for many women out there now. They ASKED me to be more blatantly dominant and controlling and told me they enjoyed it. It escalated into BDSM as they slowly admitted interest in "stuff they have always been ashamed or scared to admit they liked or wanted".

So here I am, just looking to learn more about myself, and what my subs want and need.